I Haven’t Changed, I Give Everyone Their Own Value
“ I haven’t changed, the time has come in my life when I have to give each person the value they really deserve”. If at some stage in your life cycle you have felt this need, you must not feel guilty: prioritizing yourself is a basic way to find balance, happiness.
People, anxious to please and treat everyone equally, are usually unable or do not have the courage to “stop feeding” certain bonds which, far from enriching them, harm them. When all this ends, something has changed .
According to a study carried out by the University of Claremont in the United States, acting according to our values and having faith in those around us is a way to increase oxytocin levels, in simple words, to be happy.
Ultimately, it’s about doing what we feel and acting on our own scale of values. “ I haven’t changed; if now I tell you that I don’t want to do you this favor, it is because it goes against my principles ”.
We invite you to reflect on this topic.
I have not changed, I am faithful to my values
The secret of happiness is not to accumulate wealth or have many friends. It is not about “accumulating people”, like someone who takes pride in having thousands of likes in a photo on social networks.
It is about “having quality people”, figures that allow us to be ourselves in every moment without the need to do or say things we don’t feel. We know, however, that it is by no means easy.
We live in a society made up of appearances, in which we feel the need to “please everyone”
We must never forget this: whoever becomes obsessed with the idea of pleasing and pleasing everyone around him , gets only unhappiness.
- We all go through periods of our life when we need to be recognized. Teens try to be accepted by their group to feel integrated. Later, as adults, many seek the same to be loved by their partner.
- Those who seek to be loved by others forget to love themselves.
- It is sufficient to maintain an ideal balance every day: we must not set limits at any time, it is about knowing how to live with respect towards ourselves and towards others.
- If in your immediate circle you constantly feel the need to be different people, perhaps the time has come for a change of scenery. Such a situation maintained for a long time can produce a crisis of identity and self-esteem.
I will not let anyone change me: I like myself the way I am
You have faced efforts, sacrifices and discoveries. Personality has a genetic component, it derives from experiences and from the evaluation we make of it.
It is a path where everything counts. We have acquired a system of values, beliefs, attitudes that we should never give up. By doing this, we would stop being ourselves.
- Maybe you start a relationship and find that it is not for you, that you are not happy. The other person will likely tell you that you have changed overnight. What you liked no longer appeals to you.
- Don’t be swayed. Nobody changes overnight, it’s the others who don’t care to really know.
The important thing is to maintain self-esteem, the conception we have of us and our values. Being part of a couple, living with others, often forces us to give in in certain situations. However, this “sale” must be seen as an exchange in which everyone wins and nobody loses.
- To be a partner, mother, son, brother or friend, one must know how to listen and always establish a fair exchange.
- It is not necessary to coincide in everything, to share the same interests, tastes or desires; the essential thing is to have the same values.
- Never change aspects of your personality or your interests for others, so as not to disappoint them. Being as others expect is a personal dissonance that leads only to unhappiness.
In order not to give in, not to let oneself be controlled by others, it is necessary to know oneself. Always remember what your limitations are and to what extent you are capable of letting others undermine your self-esteem. It is worth bearing in mind.
